Billy's Lines Of Gibberish

Two cats having lunch in Mdina — Malta, Feb 2007.

They take up residence under a car in Rabat. You find them lying on low walls overhanging Grand Harbour in Valletta. They thread their way through fishing boats turned upside down on the quays in Senglea...

Wherever you  stroll around in Malta, you meet cats.

Many males are russet, many females are tricolour. They're usually alone in the streets, sometimes grouped together in the parks. People feed them. In Valetta's streets, you can see small boxes or plates at many doors, with leftovers, catfood, water or milk. In Lower Baracca gardens, dinner time is impressive when some inhabitants come and bring food to twenty or so multicoloured cats. They don't fight. They share. They have time.

Malta in this respect reminds me of Venice, Greek islands or Provençal villages: cats seem to be the real masters here. Lenient masters actually, who put up with humans as long as they don't move too near, and serve them well. I believe they enjoy living in such beautiful locations, although they pretend to overlook gorgeous sceneries with supreme indifference. They know they are part of the beauty and peacefulness of the place, their native beauty holding their own against ephemeral human constructions.

If you ever worried about how I manage with cars in Malta after you heard of my difficulty in driving on the left, please don't worry any more: I learned fast.

I read today an agonized call on the website of the SPA (Société protectrice des animaux, the French Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals):

CALL FOR WITNESSES

The SPA is looking for 4 elephants that are part of the Big Foot Show. They were seen in Cavalaire-sur-Mer lately, and we need to find them! If you have any information, please call us immediately (+33 143 xxx xxx or the Internet).

Two and a half months after they made off, nowhere on the web I read news about the cute pets being found again... Therefore, if you ever see elephants on a road close to your place, especially in Europe or Middle East — I mean, elephants whose colour is grey, not pink — no need to go and see a doctor: you might have met the poor little things on their way back to native Kenya.

Losing their elephants... people are absent-minded sometimes, aren't they.

My brother, who sells cosmetics on the international market, told me several times funny stories about warnings he must put on products his company markets in the USA, so as not to be sued.

For instance, soap packages should be labelled do not eat and eye liner pencils do not apply while driving. Apparently though, get a brain before use has not yet been displayed anywhere.

Quoting Bob Dorigo Jones, president of a US consumer watchdog called Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch (M-LAW): it used to be that if someone spilled coffee in their lap, they simply called themselves clumsy. Today, too many people are calling themselves an attorney. If I were silly enough to eat a soap, for sure I would never tell it anyone after! but some people dare everything, don't they... This sue first, ask questions later mentality has not only produced wacky warning labels. It has also increased the cost of products and services families use daily.

A couple of days ago, M-LAW declared the winners of their 10th annual Wacky Warning Label contest. Sometimes, it is hard to know whether the company is being outright stupid or if they are simply targeting the most brain dead dumb! This year, the winning label was found on a washing machine in a laundermat: Do not put people in washing machine, it displays. The second place award came from a personal watercraft that warns: Never use a lit match or open flame to check fuel level. The one I love most is the third award though: Don’t try to dry your phone in a microwave oven, a cellphone instructions leaflet warns.

Several warnings awarded in the previous years were quite brilliant also:
— On a baby stroller: Remove child before folding;
— On a blanket: Not to be used as protection from a tornado;
— On the handle of a household iron: Never iron clothes while they are being worn;
— On the package of a brass fishing lure with a three-pronged hook on the end: Harmful if swallowed (ouch);
— On a toilet bowl cleaning brush: Do not use orally (eww).

These are good pieces of advice definitely. Thank you, guys.

What was usually displayed in South Park could well be true now, don't you think?

It was not a surprise the Iraqi prime minister, Nuri al-Maliki, was glad with Saddam's execution. Same with Iran, two decades after a war with about two millions Iranians killed. No surprise either that many Muslims were shocked he was killed on the day of Eid el-Kbir.

George Bush said yesterday that Saddam's execution was an important milestone on Iraq's course to becoming a democracy... It appears quite strange to a European, since there are few democratic countries that still enforce death penalty! (see previous blog entry) It has been outlawed in all European countries, usually for decades. Then no surprise again that official reactions in Europe were similar to the German one: There are no doubts whatsoever about Saddam's crimes. But we are opposed to the death penalty, no matter where it is used. EU Commissionner Louis Michel even said: You don't fight barbarism with acts that I deem as barbaric.

Fully agreed: murdering a murderer puts you down to his level. Also, I cannot help but being worried the trial undoubtedly failed to satisfy international fair standards. Quoting Amnesty International:

Saddam Hussein's trial [...] was a deeply flawed affair. Political interference undermined the independence and impartiality of the court, causing the first presiding judge to resign and blocking the appointment of another. The court did not take measures to protect witnesses and defence lawyers, three of whom were assassinated during the course of the trial. Saddam Hussein was denied access to legal counsel for the first year after his arrest. The appeal process was obviously conducted in haste and failed to rectify any of the flaws of the first trial.

Therefore, this hasty killing will be seen by many as nothing else than victor's justice. Most probably, it will not help things to go better in Iraq, just the contrary.